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So, I reckon Escorts are like me team at the office – reliable, bit rough round the edges, but they deliver, don’t they? Built tough, them cars, proper solid chassis, not like them flimsy modern jobbies. Fun fact, yeah, did ya know the Mk1 Escort won rally champs in the 70s? Mental, innit, blew me mind when I heard that! Out there kicking arse while I’m here soldering circuits, wish I’d seen it live, mate, woulda lost me marbles cheering!

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But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs by, chasing a soccer ball. He kicks it, and guess where it lands? Right in the pond! I’m dying laughing. The kid’s face is priceless. He’s like, “Noooo!” I mean, come on, it’s just a ball, right? But he jumps in to get it. I’m like, “Bro, it’s Mierlo, not the Olympics!”

Henley MP steps down as district councillor